Cincinnati selfishness hit a new low this weekend when two players beat theopposition on their own. Simon Bevan - already at the centre of several 'Me, Me, Me' battinginquiries - and Tim Ross humiliated the rest of the team by putting on an undefeated 164 opening stand off 27.4 overs. A packed batting line-up looked on helplessly as Selfish (Bevan's realname) - hogged the strike to plunder 110 not out off the hapless London Saints attack and steer us to our first-ever 10-wicket win.
'I was seeing it like a football - MY football!' Said selfish after the rain-interrupted match.Ross - known as Test Match Tim for his, er, 'measured' approach to taking guard - dropped anchor at the other end.Will drummed his fingers idly on his bat which for some reason he had bothered to knock in. At one point, Tim, who ended up 44 not out, livened things up by insisting on having the sightscreen moved and repainted, only for the bowler to decide he wasn't coming round the wicket after all.M eanwhile, Solitaire - sorry, I mean, Selfish - barrelled along,despatching the ball to all corners of the rain-soaked pitch, to reach his first century of the season. Earlier, the rest of us had a bit of a look-in when Saints were restricted to 164 for 8 off 35 overs. It went wrong for them from the start when the opener took a quick single to the Skip at mid-on only to fall to a direct hit. The Skip immediately left the field, muttering something about 'this is the day to buy a lottery ticket. Back in a minute.' Big Jim was his usual generous self to the Opposition batsmen - three for 17 off seven overs. All the other bowlers chipped in a with a wicket apiece- Max, Test Match, the Chairman, newcomer Craig (a Yorkshireman but seemed a nice guy) and even the Skip who got the Saints' captain with a "vicious,turning leg break' (his words).It was actually a trademark piece of sharp stumping from wicket-keeper Jack who defied the duck-pond conditions brilliantly all day. New boys Alex Barker and Jason Lewis helped out gamefully in the field, despite Jason's WC Grace-vintage cricket shoes coming apart as he galloped(unsuccessfully) after a snick through the slips.And so to the tea! In stark contrast to the lack of sharing that followed in our innings, Big Jim and his fiancee Lucy laid on a right royal spread - so lavish that the table collapsed or was that Max breaking it later on? It was the last collapse of the day as Selfish and Test Match strode out to humble Saints. Later, much later on Sunday night, after we'd left the ground, even after we'd bade farewell to the Hare and Billet, something stirred in the pitch black gloom of a deserted Greenwich Park. Test Match Tim had slipped back in to enlist the help of two squirrels and a passing hedgehog to get that sightscreen shifted. PS: "Test Match Tim the Title Track" is available shortly on Cincinnati CC Records, sung to the tune of Postman Pat.
PS: Our picture shows Lucy and Big Jim with their award-winning tea.
2 comments:
Posted by Selfish Batter but written by the Skip
I would just like to point out that the trees behind the bowler were very dark and that the sightscreen was very useful only it was not that useful when the bowler moved to bowling around the wicket so I asked if it would be possible to move the sightscreen so I could see the ball and I don't think really that's so bad as all batsmen like to be able to see the ball they are supposed to be hitting because that's only fair after all and it's really very good that there are sight screens at all at our home ground so I thought it would be a good idea to try to use them and there have been so many times when we have not had sight screens and I have got out because I couldn't see it properly and this time I didn't want to get out because I thought with a Test match coming up it was important to be careful.
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